And I went down to my old neighborhood
The faces have all changed there’s no one left to talk to
And the pool hall I loved as a kid
Is now a Seven Eleven
Life goes by so fast
You only want to do what you think is right.
Close your eyes and then it’s past;
Story of my life
Part of the challenge was to be a little more personal. I actually sat down today with little motivation other than that — to be more personal. You probably know me well enough by now (that is, people who have been reading for a while. If you are new here due to Blaugust, then disregard) that I don’t usually write free-form stream-of-consciousness blog posts. They usually revolve around a theme, be it patch notes or a game playthrough, or follow a format such as the couch podtatoes and state of the game posts. But maybe there’s something you didn’t know about me, even though it’s been right there for you to read all along.
I made a response on Missy’s recent Blaugust post, in which she talks about what makes a good blogger. In my response, I noted that up until about a year or so ago, my posts were mostly personal and mostly trash. I spent a few hours last night pouring through the years, and sort of re-experiencing some of the things I have gone through. I am by no means looking for sympathy, or even empathy for that matter, but I thought it was a good talking point. That brought me to the here and now, where I have no real motivation; only writing what comes to mind. I used to do this quite often. I’m amazed by how much differently my mind works, despite the posts in question only being up to 9 years old. That’s a drop in the bucket. But it’s the majority of my adult life, chronicled there for anyone to view. It sounds almost like a grand accomplishment when I say that last sentence out loud, but I assure you nothing is accomplished by rambling about drunken life events. There are some gems sprinkled among it all, but you’ll be digging.
Anyway, I ended up sitting here with a blank document, and the first title that came to mind was the one above. Suddenly I was hearing Social Distortion’s “Story of my Life,” so posting a bit of the lyrics seemed appropriate. It’s funny how I enjoyed that song when it wasn’t the story of my life, but I enjoy it more now that it is. The story of my life is endless change, with no sort of satisfaction taken from it. Change is awesome when it comes to technology, advancements in your life, and other positive aspects. Change sucks when it comes from a lack of stability. I aim to change that.
So, the big reveal. I guess I’ve already mentioned it to a few people, but it’s completely public here and now.
I’m moving next Sunday. I’ve lived in Southern California all my life, and the three towns that I’ve called home are only a couple of hours from each other. I’m moving from one “home” to another. Just as I did a few years ago. Just as I did several years before that, and before that and so on. My childhood had less moves, but I’ve basically been moving my entire life. Sometimes it was only addresses. Other times zip codes. This is a zipcode change, a scenery change, a change of heart, a change of mind. There are a lot of things that I have been neglecting that need to be addressed.
This doesn’t mean I’m going to quit what I’ve been doing. No, on the contrary I’m looking into ways to make some money at it, while I continue to self-improve. I’m hoping a fresh start with nothing holding me back is the best course of action for me. A new place where I don’t have a reputation. No skeletons in my closet, just fresh faces and new ideas. I believe this will be a step in the right direction for me. Perhaps life will once again get back on track, and stay there for once.